NEW CONCORDIA — The police perimeter outside the Wren Correctional Research Annex has become New Concordia’s hottest unwanted attraction, drawing gawkers hoping to glimpse the facility rumored to contain genetically altered prisoners and experimental animals.

Authorities have repeatedly ordered residents away from restricted sections of the industrial district while biological teams inspect the building.

That has not stopped spectators.

“I heard there was a minotaur,” said one man standing across the street with binoculars. “You tell me there’s a minotaur in my tax bracket and I’m coming to look.”

Investigators did find the remains of an enormous horned hybrid inside a damaged concrete tracking course, according to a source familiar with the scene. Officials have refused to use the word “minotaur.”

Naturally, everyone else is now using it exclusively.

Police warned residents against approaching fences, entering service roads or attempting to collect debris as souvenirs.

New Concordia has museums, casinos, bars, concerts and professional sports.

Please attend one of those until the government finishes counting the monsters.